When did I get to be the grownup? Some of the things that come out of my mouth have made me pause and look around for who actually said that. This happened the other day in the car. In the car that wasn’t totaled.
I got the call (while I was on the air with John Williams) from my hysterical 9 year old…after about 3 minutes of inaudible hyperventilating she managed to tell me the babysitter had just crashed our minivan. I busted out of the studio (thanks Adam Carter for covering the news) and drove, as carefully as I could to my baby, the sitter and our crumbled van.
Everyone was OK. Even the person my van rear-ended. Thank goodness. OMG, thank goodness. When I saw Marley we both burst into tears and comforted each other, then we hugged the sitter and I introduced myself to the cops.
Despite the insurance entanglements, lack of car to transport the kids and a very scary experience, all was right with the world. The girls were OK. On the drive home, I heard these words: “This a perfect time to be grateful. Difficult experiences always teach us something. We can feel scared, overwhelmed, hurt, but you will be OK. Bad times pass, everything will be OK.”
Who said that?
Oh, me, yeah, I’m the mom, umm, I said it, yeah that’s right, sure, I think it was me. Yes, I’m pretty sure it was me.
The babysitter smiled for the first time after I said it. The burns on her wrist from the airbag were now battle wounds, and my 9 year old was regaling me with the story of how her glasses flew off on impact.
Wow, a few words completely changed their perspectives. My words weren’t planned, they just came out because it was how I felt. I was so grateful. (I was also a panicked lunatic a few moments prior to arriving on the accident scene.) But when I needed her, the SuperMom in me stepped up. She was calm, strong, organized, and she said the right things.
The babysitter told me right after they crashed all she could think about was my Marley. Now that’s a good babysitter. The nurturer in her came out, and in a crisis she also did the right thing. She remained calm until I arrived. Well done, SuperSitter.
We all learned lessons that day. Did I want to ring the babysitters neck for putting my precious child in danger? Yes. Did I do it? No. Did I want to place Marley (and my other two kids) in a bubble so nothing dangerous would ever happen to them ever again? Yes. Did I do it? No. (Although if someone invents that bubble, please call me.)
Did I want to call someone to meet me at the accident scene because I was a puddle of nerves didn’t think I could handle it alone? Yes. Did I do it? No. Did I handle it? Yes. Did I make the girls feel better? Yes. Did I empower them and teach them resilience? Yes. Did I pour a glass of wine when I got home…Yah, You betcha.
There is a superhero in all of us. When you are called, you will rise. You will say the right things, make the right choices and unleash your inner WonderWoman/SuperMan. Then you will pour wine.