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Top 10 Worst Songs From 'Jock Jams'

A year ago, we counted down the top 10 greatest songs from the immortal "Jock Jams" compilation series. It was a trip down memory lane, to be sure. And while there was some disagreement among our panel as to what the very best of the best were, we generally agreed that the list reflected what it intended. (Okay, okay, I still resent that we couldn't find room for Black Box's "Strike It Up," The Bucketheads' "The Bomb," or Rob Base and DJ E-Z Rock's "It Takes Two," but I've since moved on.)

But in searching through tracklists for each of the five main installments, it became clear that they weren't faultless. In fact, they're downright littered with the detritus of 1990s stadium anthems. And so, we're counting down the ten most embarrassing "Jock Jams" ever. They run the gamut from forehead-slapping relics of their era to annoyances for all time.

Note that cheerleader interludes, those cutesy megamixes (speaking of dated '90s trends), and organ ditties by Ray Castoldi were deemed ineligible. And there are no "honorable mentions" here, although I will note that I did circle in a holding pattern over KC & the Sunshine Band's "Get Down Tonight" for strictly personal reasons. I also hovered over "Macho Man," but I figured kicking the Village People once was good enough.

Read on and cringe.

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Republica - Ready To Go (Pop Version) by DesiderataHun on YouTube

No. 10: Republica, "Ready To Go"

Not a terrible tune, per se. Actually it's incredibly catchy and karaoke-ready. But it's also way too cute and lightweight to be a true-blue stadium-revving anthem. Sorry, pink jacket-clad Saffron.

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No. 9: Amber, "This Is Your Night"

The same goes for this Amber track, which makes the list if only because ESPN and Tommy Boy Records never did manage to acquire the rights to Haddaway's "What Is Love," to which Amber's song bears more than just a passing resemblance.

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Fatboy Slim - Going Out Of My Head [Official Video] by Fatboy Slim on YouTube

No. 8: Fatboy Slim, "Going Out Of My Head"

You know that Eric Andre character who walks up to people in frosted tips, cargo shorts, cutoff shirts and wraparound Oakleys and tries to get them to "ranch it up"? That character still listens to this song daily.

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Brooklyn Bounce - Get Ready to Bounce (Original) by vampywiz17 on YouTube

No. 7: Brooklyn Bounce, "Get Ready To Bounce"

Listless, generic rave drops aplenty add up to one of the more puzzling choices in the "Jock Jams" franchise. At least some of the other bad songs still have a little octane in their tanks. And the less said about that goth Mentos commercial of a music video, the better.

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All I Have To Give Dance Remix BackStreet Boys by hernando on YouTube

No. 6: Backstreet Boys, "All I Have To Give" (Remix)

You had to be there.

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Village People - YMCA OFFICIAL Music Video 1978 by Village People on YouTube

No. 5: Village People, "YMCA"

For what it's worth, this is actually the best song out of the ten listed here; writer-producer-svengali Jacques Morali knew his way around a winning formula. But as the years have passed this anthem long ago wore out its welcome to the point that those four letters make us think of a whole number of other four-letter words.

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No. 4: DJ Miko, "What's Up"

It took a lot of hard work to make what was already one of the most annoying hit singles of the '90s even less listenable, but I think DJ Miko managed to summon the sort of alchemy to make that happen. What's up? Our lunch.

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No. 3: Los Del Rio, "Macarena"

Put your hands on your hips, put your hands on your shoulders, put your hands behind your head ... and then put your fingers in your ears and pray for sweet release.

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Chumbawamba - Tubthumping (Official Music Video) by ChumbawambaVEVO on YouTube

No. 2: Chumbawamba, "Tubthumping"

The epitome of America's late '90s preoccupation with the absolute worst aspects of other English-speaking (but here just barely) nations. It's too bad for them this anti-establishment band's accidental anthem got co-opted by the mainstream, but hey, maybe they shouldn't have written such a terrible, hook-ridden song.

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No. 1: Rednex, "Cotton Eye Joe"

It just doesn't get any more "LOL '90s" than this unholy hybrid of country-fried fiddle kitsch and relentless Hi-NRG drum sequencing. Almost admirable in its ability to irritate the eardrum.

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