TALE OF THE TAPE

The Giants Losing To Carolina Vs. Little Mac Losing To Glass Joe In “Punch-Out”

Giants Losing
Little Mac Losing
elicredit2.jpg
boxingcredit2.jpg
Opponent's Hometown
Giants: Charlotte, North Carolina. Oooo! It’s supposed to be lovely there!
Winner Little Mac: France. FRANCE. FRAAAAAAAA-
Opponent’s Record Before Match:
0-2
Winner 1-99
Predictable Offense?
Winner I don’t know if it’s predictable, but cripes is it boring.
He’s got about 5 punches to dodge, so yes.
Motivational Halftime Speech?
(unprintable)
Winner “Join the Nintendo Fun Club Today, Mac!”
Secret weapon?
Winner Throwing to Victor “Look at my stupid dance, I’m a jerk!” Cruz.
Pressing “Start” when he has a star punch.
Post Loss Quote?
Winner “Disappointing is not a strong enough word.”
Give up? Retire? Start training, make a comeback!
Future Implications?
Winner Maybe we can finally stop having the stupid “Which Manning is Better?” debate.
He’s doomed against Von Kaiser - nevermind Bald Bull or the second fight against Don Flamenco.

The Winner Is

elicredit2.jpg
Winner Giants Losing
4 out of 7

Gloriously losing once again, the boring, listless Giants drop one to Little Mac and Glass Joe, 4-3. Having watched my beloved Patriots drop two awful Super Bowls to them, I gotta say: this defeat is pretty good.

-Brian Cullen, CBS Local Sports contributor

MORE TALES OF THE TAPE

  1. (credit: CBS) (credit: CBS)
    Better Acquisition: Kevin Garnett Or Torii Hunter?

    These two moves are the most recent in a series of moves where Minnesota sports teams are bringing back fan favorites who left after starting their careers here. So it begs the question, who’s the better acquisition, Garnett for the Timberwolves or Hunter for the Twins?

  2. (credit: Andy Lyons/Getty Images) (credit: Alex Goodlett/Getty Images)
    Can The Gophers Still Make The NCAA Tournament?

    After losing at Indiana Sunday night, the Gophers are 16-10 overall and 5-8 in Big Ten play with five games remaining. Do they still have a chance to make the Big Dance? Here’s why they will and why they won’t.

  3. Members of the New England Patriots celebrate with the Vince Lombardi Trophy after defeating the Seattle Seahawks 28-24 in Super Bowl XLIX. Recording artist Katy Perry performs onstage during the Pepsi Super Bowl XLIX Halftime Show.
    Was Super Bowl XLIX Or Katy Perry’s Halftime Show More Exciting?

    I don’t usually watch Super Bowl halftime shows. But when I do, it has Katy Perry. How did her performance measure up to the game?

See All Tales of the Tape
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 4,270 other followers